Watch Out, the Crazy Lady is Loose!

I recently received a promotion at work, which is a good thing, but for the last few days my brain has felt like mush with all the new things that I've had to learn. It literally feels like my very first day at that job all over again with all the new things that I'm learning.

So Wednesday was my first day of training for the duties of my new position. By the end of the day my brain is absolutely fried and the very last thing that I feel like doing is cooking dinner. I get home and I will admit that I was a little annoyed and frustrated. Rob usually does the dishes after he gets home from work because he gets home so much earlier than me, and I usually do most of the cooking. I get home, and the dishes are not done, which I really shouldn't complain about, but I had to scrub the one pot that I needed to cook dinner. Rob could tell that I was upset and kept asking me what was wrong.

Now, although he wanted to help with whatever was wrong, I was not in a place to talk about it. I was teetering on the edge of a cliff between being normal and just completely breaking down. Every time that he would ask what was wrong, I would reply a curt, "nothing" which of course annoyed him and made him prod further, of course aggravating me more and the cycle continues.

I finally snap and tell him to just leave me alone and let me cook the stupid dinner. I get the dinner cooked without killing anyone. I dish out dinner for Elisa and Rob, then announce that I'm going to the bedroom to lay down. I lay down on the bed and curl up in the fetal position and have a good cry. I had so much built up stress and frustration from the day that I just needed to get out. Sometimes a good cry can really cure all.

After I stopped crying I laid there for a while calming down. Then I start thinking about how I was acting and I'm ashamed of myself for having a temper tantrum that could put my daughter's tantrums to shame. I then decide to suck it up and go back out to the living room. Rob looks at me and asks me if I'm going to have something to eat now. I say yes, but first I go over to him and give him a hug and tell him that I'm sorry and I wasn't mad at him I was just frustrated with my day and I was taking it out on him. He forgave me for being a crazy woman and we went on with our night as usual.

The truth is, I've always been a person that has needed time to decompress after a hard day. My mom always said that even when I was in grade one I needed time to relax and calm down before I was ready to talk about my day. Sometimes I forget to take that time. If I had just sat down for five minutes and told Rob about my day and how overwhelmed I felt that day, then perhaps the whole fiasco could have been avoided.

Thankfully, Rob is patient with me and has accepted the fact that I am a little insane at times.